Obedience Isn’t the Answer

When Obedience Isn’t the Answer

“Hi! I need to sign my dog up for obedience training.”

This is usually said with the tone of someone booking an oil change. Quick. Practical. A clear solution to a clear problem.

“Absolutely,” I say. “Tell me a little about your dog.”

There’s a pause.
“Well… he’s really sweet at home. But on walks he loses his mind when he sees other dogs. And if people come over, he barks the entire time. I keep telling him to knock it off, but he just won’t listen. I figure if he learns better commands, that should fix it.”

The Obedience Myth

Somewhere along the way, we decided that obedience/skill training is the cure-all. Dog pulling on leash? Obedience/Skills. Dog growling at visitors? Obedience/Skills. Dog panicking when left alone? Definitely obedience/skills.

To be clear: obedience/skill training is not the villain here. A well-run class with a skilled, reward-based instructor can be fantastic in building communication and trust between a dog and their human and can absolutely play a small role in behavior cases. Learning how to walk politely on leash or come when called is useful for literally everyone involved.

But usefulness and relevance are not the same thing.

When Skills Aren’t the Problem

If your dog is panicking, reacting, or melting down, the issue usually isn’t that he doesn’t know what “sit” means or that they aren’t “listening” to you.

Dogs who scream at the end of the leash, hide behind furniture, destroy door frames, or snarl when someone reaches toward them aren’t lacking manners. They’re overwhelmed and dysregulated.

And here’s the part that really messes with people: plenty of dogs with excellent training still struggle emotionally. You can have a dog who walks  beautifully in class and still completely unravels when a skateboard goes by. Training didn’t “fail.” It just wasn’t addressing the right thing.

Thinking Brain vs. Survival Brain

Obedience cues live in the thinking part of the brain. They’re behaviors your dog performs on purpose.

Sit happens → treat appears.
Lie down → praise happens.
Walk nicely → forward motion continues.

That’s cause and effect. It’s Operant Conditioning. It’s logical. It’s science. It’s learning theory. It works great when your dog’s nervous system is regulated and calm enough to participate.

Behavior problems live somewhere else entirely.

When a dog reacts out of fear or anxiety, the thinking brain goes offline. You’re now dealing with instinct, adrenaline, and self-preservation. In that moment, your dog is not deciding whether to behave. He’s trying to survive what feels threatening to him.

That’s why yelling, correcting, or demanding skills so often backfires. You’re asking for calculus during a fire.

You Can’t Cue an Emotion

You can cue a dog to sit.
You cannot cue a dog to stop being scared.

Trying to “correct” fear is like telling someone with a phobia to relax harder. It doesn’t work because emotions aren’t voluntary. Your dog isn’t blowing you off. He’s flooded.

Which means the solution isn’t more cues.

It’s changing how the situation feels to the dog.

Feelings First, Behavior Second

Real behavior work focuses on emotional associations. If your dog panics when guests arrive, we don’t start by forcing polite greetings. We start by making people predict good things. If other dogs cause explosions on walks, we don’t drill sits — we teach the dog that seeing another dog means safety, space, food, and predictability.

When the emotion shifts, the behavior fades. No wrestling match required.

It’s quieter.

It’s calmer.

And it actually sticks.

So Where Does That Leave Obedience/Skills?

Right where it belongs — as a tool, not a cure.

If your dog is struggling with reactivity, anxiety, or aggression, working one-on-one with a qualified professional, hi there, I can help you HERE, is usually a much better investment than tossing them into a group class and hoping for the best.

(And yes, it’s okay to ask about credentials, experience, and approach. You’re hiring a professional, not joining a cult.)

And if you also want to take a Skills class? Great. Truly. Just make sure it’s appropriate for your dog and understand what it can — and can’t — do.

Training isn’t about making dogs behave.

It’s about helping them feel safe enough to learn.

And that’s a very different job.

If you want help building a recall that would make even the squirrels jealous, you know where to find me. 🐾

Sara Sokol is owner of Mr. Dog Training in Brunswick Maine; A positive reinforcement dog training facility, offering both virtual and in person classes, that has been voted best training in Maine.